Sometimes when you hear a story you wonder the truth of it.
Many a person will retell a tale with their own variation on the facts. I am
here to set the record straight. I have a story and can state that this is the
truth as I was the Baronial Herald and it was my job to record important
information. To insure that those who needed to know would have the
information, I would be the one to investigate and to insure I had all the
information those that needed to know knew.
Long ago there was a Flaming Jewel within the Lands of
Septentria. So great was her passion and skill that she was a fighting Baroness
in these lands. She commanded the troops of Septentria with a devious smile
that those who beheld her vision knew she was up to something. But whatever that
something might be would be enjoyed and most entertaining. Especially to her.
While down south in the debatable lands there was Pennsic
War. The Baroness had gathered her troops and marched down to join in to the
fray. She brought with her, easily half of Ealdormere’s army that year with
nearly three dozen fighters and two dozen archers.
The Septentrian fighters would protect their Baroness with
such zeal that she took pleasure to command them from the field.
But on one dreadful day a polearm was lucky enough to fell
this mighty Baroness.
Let me assure you all, that she was fine for the most part.
The fighters swarmed to her protection and the chiurginate brought aid within
moments of her being struck.
As for the person who wielded the polearm, well, he was not
so … um…. Fortunate.
You see the good gentle with the polearm was one of her
Excellency’s own warriors. Furthermore he hit her after the battle had been
won. He was even so brazen as to hit her in the head. And, she was not wearing
a helmet at the time.
Now as I said she was fine. For the most part. But it seems
that this blow had caused her to have problems with memory loss. We were
assured that she would recover completely and that this was only a temporary condition.
But for the next few days she did make some odd claims and requests and kept
all of her staff and protectors on their toes.
The most glaring example of this would come on the night
when Septentrian court was held at Pennsic. Now I know you must be wondering
how could Septentria hold court while in the Debatable Lands?
Long is the tradition that Septentrians would bring with
them the earth of Septentria to the Debatable Lands. They would bring rocks,
dirt, twigs, leaves and whatever else they might find on the ground at home. This
would then be spread out on the ground under the Septentrian thrones so that
her Excellency would be on Septentrian lands while her court was being held.
As an example of this memory problem, I now invite you to
hear what happened at court. And I remind you, I was the Baronial Herald and as
such had a good view, and was at her side during the entire court.
Most of the court business was fairly plain. The giving of arm
rings, Bear’s Hearts and Bear’s Claws. But at one point her Excellence asked me
to make a special request. And so I did my duty, in a clear voice I asked “Now
requested into court is Lord Odd’s …. Mug.”
Now to be clear, Lord Odd was a fine gentle and he had a mug
of some repute. To give you a vision of the mug if you took a salad bowl and
put it on a pedestal you would not have a mug as large as Lord Odd’s. I have
heard that the closest that anyone could come to describing it is as being the
size of a punch bowl with a goblet base upon which it stood. And it was
entirely made of pottery, so it weighed a fair bit.
And it could hold a half dozen “beers” within it, with ease.
It was reported that it could hold as much as one dozen if you filled it
entirely.
When Lord Odd’s mug was brought into court, by Lord Odd of
course, the gathering had to wonder as to why pottery was being requested into
court.
Once Lord Odd’s mug arrived her Excellency dipped her mug
into Lord Odd’s mug and refilled her beer.
As I stated, she was having memory issues and was making ‘Odd’
requests.
But that was not the only one and, in my opinion, paled in
comparison to the request she made of the warrior with the polearm.
Upon her cue, I invited into court that fine gentle.
“Now requested to come forth before her Excellency is his
Lordship…I mean her Lordship… um his Ladyship…. er her Ladyship …. uh Redmund.”
During the days between the blow that struck her Excellency
and the night of Court it seems that her Excellency was delighted to hear that
Lord Redmund would be attending court in a dress. Feeling guilty for striking
her Excellency, and in an effort to appease her, he decided to get a dress and
wear it on the eve in question.
Now I will admit to being a little fuzzy on the next part as
when Redmund walked into court he stepped not before her Excellency, but walked
straight up to me and planted a kiss on my lips. I was stunned and fainted for a
mere moment. Luckily the ground under me was soft. But, I was alert enough to hear
her Excellency assure Lord Redmund that she seemed to have recovered enough
that she forgave him his transgression.
And I am pleased to say that Her Excellency has gone on too
much greater glory and has graced the Kingdom of Ealdormere as our Queen on
more than one occasion.
Although, every so often she does make special requests, and
they could still be considered a little odd.
Notes:
The Baroness of this Story is now Queen Adrielle
The Baronial Herald and author is THL Ulvar
And yes, like most stories, it is all true.
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